Pamela Wright, ESQ.

Empower YOUR Child to Live Their Brilliance!

Free Tele-Seminar “The Magnetism of the Awakening Parent” on October 29, 2009, at 9 p.m. (EST)

Looking back on your recent years, can you pinpoint the exact moment that the spiritual principles and universal ideals like the Law of Attraction really hit home for you?  What was it like when you finally came to the realization that manifesting and creating your own life experience brought you freedom?

Now, think back a little farther.  What did it take to bring you to that point?  What did you have to overcome in regards to your upbringing – the limitations you grew up with and experienced even through adulthood?  What were the fears and beliefs that you had to get past?

Now, imagine – not having years (perhaps even generations!) of your life to overcome.  What would your life look like now if you had actually known those very principles from the time you were a young girl.  What an amazing gift that would be!

My colleague Cyndi Cerny, founder of the Blissful Transformation of the Chaotic Family program, loves to imagine such things.  Cyndi has spent over 20 years of her journey on the very possibility of gifting your child (regardless of age...youngster to adult) with the ability to experience life in this way.  On Thursday, October 29th at 9:00 p.m. EST, Cyndi is offering a complimentary tele-seminar called The Magnetism of the Awakening Parent. 

Do you want to see a dramatic shift happen within your family?  Do you want to give your children the chance to grow up free of lack-based thinking and un-serving beliefs?  Register here today for Cyndi’s complimentary tele-seminar:  The Magnetism of the Awakening Parent:

(click the link below to register)
http://tinyurl.com/yz8bxyt
 

4 Stages of a Product Launch (Will Help YOU launch a NEW Business!)

4 Stages of a Product Launch

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Divorce Is Not a Sprint...It's a Marathon!

If you are preparing for divorce or already involved in one, keep in mind that the divorce process is not a sprint.  Now, it may seem like a sprint because of all the activity that takes place at the beginning of a case but it is not.  

Divorce follows a process and this process is more like a marathon than a sprint.  In a divorce you must be able to go the distance.  As you go through your divorce, keep this in mind.  Pace yourself weekly, renew your energy continually and move forward faithfully!

Fabienne Fredrickson's Inspiring Video Vision Board!

This video has inspired me to create a video version of my vision board. My goal is to complete it by the end of September 2009. Do you have a vision board?

How do YOU Present in Court?

I handled two cases this week where my client was self-represented before I came on the scene.  In each case she did the best she could but her emotions and lack of legal knowledge worked against her in court. 

From the moment I came on the case I could tell there was work to be done in preparing my clients to present well in court.  Are you aware of how you present in court?  If you haven't filed your case yet still think about this question.  How you come across in court or in a child custody evaluation is critical to your case. 

You want to come across as a good mother who is level headed, stable and cares about the best interests of her children.  It is not the time to be emotional or overly sensitive.  In my experience, it is not the time for tears either.  However, if tears come don't freak out just regain your composure and keep going through the process whether it be a court hearing or questioning in a child custody evaluation.  

Remember, the courtroom and courthouse is a conservative place so gage your emotions accordingly.  When you present your case confidently free of emotional outbursts or breakdowns, you're more likely to get your point across and will have a better chance of getting what you want in court.

Planting Seeds for A Conscious Divorce

What type of divorce do you want?  Have you ever thought about that question?  Well, I would encourage you to think about it.  Your decision could save or cost you thousands of dollars.

Divorce plays out several ways.  One style is highly litigious, reactive and very expensive while the other is more consicous, fair-minded and more likely to preserve your wealth.

A Conscious Divorce starts with a mind open towards being conscious, fair, and reasonable.  I'll be writing more about the Conscious-Based Approach to Divorce throughout the summer.

Mediate or Litigate?

Getting divorced brings a slew of questions about the process.  One of the first things you'll want to decide is whether you want to mediate or litigate.

Mediation is a process whereby you and your spouse will work with a neutral third party to craft a settlement agreement.  This person is supposed to be neutral to the issues and not biased towards one side or the other. Litigation, however, is completely different and will put you and your spouse in adversarial positions to one another.  It also tends to be quite more expensive than mediation. 

The benefits of mediation include reduced legal fees, quicker resolution and peace of mind.  While, litigation benefits include getting a judge to finally decide issues you and your spouse just could never resolve and getting assets you're entitled to under the law but assets your spouse refuses to share.

As with many things, try to get a referral from a trusted source when selecting a mediator or attorney.  If your trusted source was happy with the mediator or attorney's services then you have a better chance of finding someone who can do the same for you.

Best,

Pam

The Restraining Order

Do you need a restraining order to protect you from further abuse?  If so, listen up...

In California, the police can issue you an Emergency Protective Order when they arrive at the scene and find that you are in immediate and present danger based on your allegation of recent abuse or threat of abuse.   

Once you have the Emergency Protective Order, you will need to seek a Domestic Violence Restraining Order with the Superior Court of California.  For example, women living in Los Angeles county would go to the Los Angeles Superior Court to obtain a domestic violence restraining order. 

In Los Angeles, at your first court hearing the judge typically decides whether to issue you a temporary restraining order and then sets the case for another hearing approximately 3 weeks later.  At that second hearing, the judge will hear live testimony (so bring your witnesses) and consider whether the evidence supports granting you a restraining order which could last up to 5 years and later be subject to renewal for up to 5 years or permanently (this renewal is not automatic).  

When filing your request for a restraining order be specific about the abuse.  Instead of stating "I was abused" state "He punched me in the face" or "kicked my leg."  Being specific about the abuse will help your case.  

I will be writing a series of articles on domestic violence restraining orders so stay tuned...

Take care,

Pam

   

To Keep Or Not Keep Your House

Are you going through a divorce and own a house?  If so, you'll have to decide whether you want to 1) keep your house, 2) have your interest bought out, or 3) sell the house.

If the house is community or marital property, then there is an interest that must be divided.  In California a house purchased during the marriage is considered community property (as long as there is no  prenup or postmarital agreement directing otherwise) and must be divided in the divorce.  

In California, a married couple can choose to sell the house and divide the proceeds or the judge can order the house sold when there's no agreement.  If you want to keep your house, then you must come up with a plan to buy out your spouse's interest in it.  After you do that you must be prepared to carry the mortgage. 

In these circumstances, it is a good idea to run the numbers and make sure you can afford to carry the mortgage after the divorce.  If you can, great!  If you cannot, don't sweat it...sell the house and understand that you can always buy another house later.  You do not want to fall apart or go under over a house.  I understand losing your house is difficult to accept but the consequences of not accepting it are harsh.  Remember, if you're struggling with the pain of losing your house, many women have gone on to buy another house later down the road after a divorce.  I'm praying for you to have GREAT strength!

Best,

Pam

1 Thing You Need to Know About Spousal & Child Support Before You File for Divorce

Here's 1 Thing You Need to Know About Spousal & Child Support Before You File for Divorce:

1.  How are YOU going to provide for yourself and your children financially? 

Many women going through a divorce expect their financial needs to be met by spousal and child support after the divorce is filed.  But what they don't know is that spousal and child support is not immediately awarded after the initial divorce papers are filed.  Further, spousal and child support is typically not enough to maintain their current standard of living. 

In California, a party seeking spousal and child support must file a request for it with the court AFTER the initial divorce papers are filed.  This means you need to be prepared to provide for your financial needs until the court orders spousal and child support and your spouse begins to pay it.  Your spouse may provide you with  voluntary spousal and child support before the court orders it but if he doesn't then you need to be prepared.  If the court hearing for spousal and child support is set 4-12 weeks out from the date you file your initial divorce papers then you must be prepared to meet your financial needs. 

It is a good idea to start saving for your financial needs prior to filing for divorce so you will be prepared.

Take care,

Pam